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Archive for the ‘Hawaiian’ Category


Nanabozhu decided to visit Maui on the spur of the moment. What he didn’t know was that Maui decided to visit Red Lake at the same time. So they missed each other. Nonetheless, Nanabozhu had a great time on Maui’s island. This morning Nanabozhu decided to greet the sun at the top of Haleakala, and take the bike tour down. He thought it was kinda funny that the tour guides slept in the van because the mountain was covered in clouds and they knew that no one would see the sun that morning from the top of the mountain.

Nanabozhu decided to check out the gift shop since it was open  during the time the sun rose. He chanced upon a Hawaiian ranger chastising a white tourist who had (N. supposed) complained about not being able to see the sunrise. The ranger said in her best berating voice. “I’m Hawaiian, and we are taught from when we are very young to discern things with all six of our senses, not just our sight. Now if you’ll excuse me I have a duty to perform.” And with that she left.

You go girl!” Nanabozhu thought. The term “Haoli”, coming to mind.  Outsiders would always be Haoli to a native people. There would always be that sense of otherness between them. He had to smile at the irony. Here, Nanabozhu was haoli.

He then followed her outside to a crowd of about six hundred people who had gathered, and this is what he saw and said:

tour

Cold impenetrable fog whips their hair.

A crowd and Japanese tour couples stand huddled.

Their windbreakers occasionally wrapped in ineffectually thin blankets.

Waiting in vain for a visible sunrise.

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stratus clouds embrace Lanai

silhouettes before a setting sun

their edges chiaroscuro

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a lovelorn Partridge

drumming wildly for a mate

lures a gun instead

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Nanabozhu quietly got out of the bed and stole out of the room. He went outside to await the dawn. When the sun appeared, so did the voice of Haumea whisper on the early morning zephyr.
 
“I can’t stay long Nanabozhu as I hear Pele rousing, but remember this; I am the living Earth mother here and the lava is my blood.” and just that quickly the whisper faded.
 
As Pele approached, Nanabozhu could see that Pele had put on the appearance of her beautiful self. “Shall I show you the caldera today? Tourists aren’t allowed at its edge but as you can see, I have special privileges.
 
On their walk there, Nanabozhu and Pele walked hand in hand and started talking about how life would be now that they were hitched. “I look forward to showing you Red Lake for our honeymoon.” Nanabozhu commented.
 
“ I would really love that,” Pele answered, “But I’m afraid I can’t leave the island because my people depend on me to control the volcano.”
 
“What!?” Nanabozhu cried incredulously as they reached the edge of the caldera. Large plumes of lava blurped out of the caldera. Heat waves rose from it as well as the red-white light illuminated their faces. “I must go back to Red Lake soon, as my people depend on me as well!” Nanabozhu was anguished. So much so, that Pele folded her arms and turned slightly away from him because it was hard for her to bear.
 
And then what Haumea had said hit home. “I cannot live like this!” Nanabozhu cried. It will upset the natural order of things!” Nanabozhu dove into the lava, and with a flare, he was gone.
 
Pele just had enough time to turn back and see his toes disappearing into it. “Nanbabozhu!” she screamed. But it was too late. She and the volcano both erupted at the same time, she in her surprise, her grief, and the Kilauea in reaction to her. She must have developed strong feelings for Nanabozhu in the short time they were together because the eruption was powerful. Great clouds of ash were thrown into the air. Ejecta rained down around the caldera and a great flow of lava ran through the park and down to the ocean.
 
Now you might think this is the end of the story but that’s not the case. You see Haumea said that the earth was alive, as was the lava which was its blood, so Nanabozhu realized that since it was living thing, he could transform into it, which he did when he dove into it. And when the lava reached the water which also was a part of the earth, and alive–kind of like its lymphatic system– Nanabozhu transformed his essence into it.
 
Nanabozhu then made a series of changes until once again he walked out of the water in his human form and onto the beach near his haole house to find five figures waiting for him. There stood, Haumea, Kuwahailo, Maui, Hi’iaka and Kane.
 
“We knew that you would figure it out, but that was quick, even for us!” Hi’iaka said and smiled at him.
 
“But you must go now, before Pele finds out,” Maui said, “or we’ll never hear the end of it. It was great spending this time with you bra,” as he gave Nanabozhu a hug and some manly slaps on the back, which Nanabozhu returned.
 
The other’s hugged him as well and said their goodbyes. Finally, Haumea said, “If you will turn into a Canadian goose, Kane will provide the jet stream to aid and speed you on your way home.”
 
This is how Nanabozhu found himself looking at the sunset over Red Lake that evening. He pondered  this latest experience, so close in time, and yet so far away.
 
Because of Nanabozhu’s Hawaiian adventure, the lava is now a little redder on the big island. And because of his experiences with Pele–even though he hasn’t changed his behavior–at least Nanabozhu now thinks twice about what he does.
 
And that’s the end of this story.

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Nanabozhu was pleased to see that Hi’iaka came to pick him up to take him to the luau. At least, if he was going to his doom, it would be on the arm of another beautiful woman.

 

When they got there, it was a little before sunset and flames from the tiki torches added to the ambiance. Pele’s family packed the place. All but the immediate family sat at great long tables filled with colorful fruit drinks in pineapple shells with their little umbrellas.

 

There were tables where you could either have a traditional Hawaiian meal or any kind of starchy sugary mainland food you desired. Naturally Nanabozhu figured if he was going to his doom that he would stuff himself silly, which is what he attempted to do.

 

 After dinner Hi’iaka again pulled Pele away, this time to help her change her outfit into one for a special Hula, where the wife dances for her husband to be. Nanabozhu quickly leaned over to Haumea and Kuwahailo.

 

“Okay, what’s this plan you mentioned yesterday?”

 

“Why, that you will marry Pele, and everything will turn out all right in the end,”  said Kuwahailo.

 

Nanabozhu’s eyes got wide. “Who came up with a plan like that?!” Nanabozhu said, rising in his seat to match the rise to his outside voice! This caused the people nearest and around them to glance at him inquisitively.

 

“Maui did. Didn’t he tell you?” Haumea answered innocently.

 

Just then, Nanabozhu felt a slight pressure on his arm and turned to find Maui had appeared beside him, gentling him down. Maui had on the best and biggest toothy grin that you will find anywhere.

 

Nanabozhu groaned, shook his head and buried his face in his hands. “I should have known.” His shoulders shook and he made little sobs as if he were crying.

 

Maui just laughed. “I really am looking out for everyone’s best interest, Nanabozhu.” he said. “If you didn’t marry Pele, she would get so angry that she would literally blow her stack, and everyone would be destroyed. But if you marry her, and then something should happen to you afterwards…our people will be saved. Pele may be upset at such a turn of events but she will not be as upset as she would be if you jilted her. The oracles have told me that when the time is right, you will find an opportunity to do what needs to be done and make the necessary sacrifice.”

 

“Oh this is just getting better and better.” Nanabozhu commented dryly.

 

At this point, the house lights extinguished and their attention was directed to the stage next to which their little table stood. There posed Pele, just out of earshot. She was resplendent in nothing but traditional Hula fronds, looking directly into Nanabozhu’s eyes.

 

Nohona Ho'olaule'a

Copyright RandyJayBraun.com

Despite his reservations, from this point on, Nanabozhu did not have a chance. While before, he had the strength to resist her glamour, strong as it was, when they were together, he could not help but be entranced by that combined with the magic she wove with the Hula  at the Luau.

 

He really did fall in love with her.
Then they did the wedding Hula and just like that, they were married.
The Wedding Dance

Copyright RandyJayBraun.com

What followed was a night of connubial bliss.

 Connubial Bliss

Wow! thought Nanabozhu as he dozed off afterward. I should do this more often.
 
***
 
The silvery light of the full moon, the time difference, and a loud strange rumbling noise woke Nanabozhu a couple of hours before the sun came up. He affectionately glanced over to where he expected to find his beautiful bride.

 

“HOLY COW!” He yelled. He couldn’t believe he didn’t wake her up, but lying next to him and snoring was a weary, aged, and ugly, wrinkled old Hawaiian crone. Her mouth was slightly open and she was drooling onto her pillow. This was the true form to which Pele reverted when she was sleeping.

 

Nanabozhu heard of Red Lakers waking up the morning-after without their beer goggles on, but being sober all along, this was scary, even for him! “I am SO not ready for this!” he exclaimed to himself.

 

(The conclusion tomorrow…)

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Pele showed up at the Haole house bright and early the next morning. “Are you ready for another day of touring the island where we can actually spend some time alone?” She asked. She was still a little put off because one of Maui’s pranks from the day before was to keep her and Nanabozhu from spending as little time together as possible. For the success of which, Nanabozhu would be eternally grateful, but which made Pele a little more clingy.
 
The problem was, even though Pele knew Nanabozhu’s secret name, she did not know what she knew, so while she was exercising power over him, she did not realize that she was!

 

At various points throughout the day, Nanabozhu would try to change into another animal when Pele was not looking, so that he could escape unnoticed. However, Pele was so clingy that Nanabozhu would be out of sight for only a few seconds before she would call him by his secret name. Thus effectively nullifying his transformations and foiling his escapes. In one ABC store, Nanabozhu saw his chance and ducked behind a display, turning into a mouse.

 

Pele called out “Oh Nanabozhu have you seen these funky “President Obama bobble heads?” She turned a corner just after her act of calling his name had turned him back into a man. She found him kneeling on the floor. “What are you doing down there?” She asked.
 
“Oh, I may have dropped a contact.” Nanabozhu replied.

 

Another time Pele was bending down and examining some orchids while they were visiting the Hawaii Tropical Botanical Garden and Nanabozhu turned into a Liwi bird and flew into a nearby tree.
 
Wouldn’t you know it, right at that moment Pele called Nanabozhu by his secret name and said, “Nanabozhu, don’t you think these orchids are beautiful?”She turned around to find him perching on one of its heavier branches. “What are you doing in that tree?” she asked.

 

“Oh, I just thought I would try ‘owling’ while I was in Hawaii.” Striking his best ‘owl’ pose, Nanabozhu said, “Take my picture so I can show the folks back home!” A somewhat perplexed Pele obliged.
 
These episodes were interspersed with “visits” by members of Pele’s nuclear and extended family. Having met Maui the day before, Nanabozhu wasn’t surprised that news had gotten around the island that Pele had found a new “fiancé”. Something which Pele was perfectly happy to let stand uncorrected.
 
“Now who started that rumor?” thought a scowling Nanabozhu.
 
They found themselves having a somewhat tempestuous breakfast–weatherly speaking–with her oldest brother, Kamohoalii: the god of sharks and the three relatives who had escorted her to the islands, Kane the Whirlwind, Ke-au-miki: the strong current, and Ke-au-ka: moving seas. Nanabozhu could really see the family resemblance, both physically and emotionally.
 
While they sat down to eat some delicious soup and sandwiches at the Canoe Club for lunch, they were joined by Namakaokahai. She was Pele’s sister who was goddess of the sea, and her husband Au-kele-nui-a-iku, who was a great sorcerer. Nanabozhu smirked all the way through that experience.
 
It turned out that Namakaokahai was not the least bit embarrassed when she explained that her now contrite looking husband had secretly married Pele and another sister, Hi’iaka while still married to her! This resulted in Nama—her nickname—chasing Pele out of the old country and onto the big island.
 
Nama’s parting shot was, “Watch out she doesn’t do it to you too!” At least Pele was still embarrassed enough to blush furiously at this, but the earth still trembled.

 

Now during the course of the day, strange things were happening with the weather. Rainbows would appear in the countryside around them without there being any rain or moisture! Other times there would be rain so heavy that it would cause the mountainsides to run with water that was red. There would be lightning and thunder without there being a cloud in the sky.
 
All of these things also happened over the course of a melt-in-your-mouth fish dinner with Pele’s parents, Kuwahailo and Haumea and Pele’s younger sister Hi’iaka, when they all met up at the Fish Hopper. Haumea and Kuwahailo looked at each other with concern in their eyes.

 

Nanabozhu noticed this and was about to ask them what was going on when Haumea looked at him and gave the tiniest shake of her head. He understood that her message was “Not now”.
 
There was a lull between when they were served their appetizer and the main course. It was at this point that Hi’iaka grabbed Pele and declared they were going to the ladies room. Now gods and goddesses didn’t have to go like we do, but she wanted to freshen up and see what her sister had to say about her new hunk. This gave Nanabozhu an opportunity to have a hurried conversation with her parents in which he let them know his feelings and his worries about what would happen to the people on the island if he were to scorn Pele.
 
 “We could tell that at this time you are not as interested in Pele as she is in you, but the strange things you see and hear happening portend that a great event is going to happen. Usually these come at the birth of a great chief or chieftess. However, we know that you are already a great chief among your people. Therefore, we can only assume that you will become one among ours. That means that you must marry Pele at the Luau our family has prepared for you tomorrow night.
 
Nanabozhu’s jaw dropped.
 
Haumea smiled. “Don’t worry. We have a plan.”
 
(To be continued)

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Maui

The morning of their first day together, Pele’ and Nanabozhu were slumming with the mortals on their tour of the Big Island. They happened to run into Pele’s brother Maui at the Hilo Farmers Market.

Nanabozhu had to smile and knew he had met a kindred manidoo when he shook Maui’s hand in greeting and received an electric jolt! The sound of the “Super Joy Buzzer” going off in Maui’s hand accompanied it. The wicked grins the two gave each other as Nanabozhu quickly recovered from this small practical joke were reminiscent of those found on two wolves that had just happened to chance upon an unsuspecting chicken in an isolated barnyard. Pele’ rolled her eyes at Maui. “Here we go again.” she said.

What’s the first thing that happens when two tricksters get together? A competition! You didn’t need to hear them say that it was on, to see which one could out-trick the other before the day was done. So back and forth they went.

Kailua Kona

The day’s round was decided in favor of Nanabozhu. He ended the evening with a prank that occurred after their swim, at the open air public showers on the beach. Since the ocean water was salty, you felt better after you rinsed off before you went home. Nanabozhu quickly rinsed himself off first.

Maui was a little more persnickety and habitually used his patented “Maui’s Wowie Shampoo and Conditioner”. Maui lathered his hair up and proceeded to rinse out the shampoo. Just when he was about done, Nanabozhu picked up the shampoo from where Maui had set it down and squirted another dollop on top of Maui’s hair. Maui could not feel the addition because of the pressure of the water already sluicing down on his noggin.

Of course, the combination of the shower water and Maui’s rinsing action lathered Maui’s hair up again. With eyes closed to keep the shampoo from irritating, Maui could not see what was going on. Maui could only tell by feel that he still had shampoo in his hair. So he continued to try to rinse it out.

Now, the grinning Nanabozhu was amused to see that he had gotten away with this once and decided to see how many times he could get away with it again. Therefore, just when Maui was almost done, Nanabozhu would add another dollop. Unsuspecting Maui would obligingly lather up again.

Three, four, five times! Nanabozhu, who realized the need to be stealthy, was silently laughing so hard that his shoulders shook and tears came out of his eyes.

Rinse, lather…rinse, lather…rinse, lather, Maui! Six, seven, eight! By the end, Nanabozhu’s wheezing snickers were covered by sound of the shower. He was laughing so hard and trying not to make any noise that he had fallen down, was holding his stomach  and rolling around on the sand while Maui–blissfully ignorant–rinsed the last of the shampoo out of his hair.

“Boy, you sure do take a long time washing your hair!” Nanabozhu could barely get the words out straight as he jumped up and handed Maui a towel.

Maui eyed Nanabozhu askance as he dried off. “You have the look of the cat that ate the canary”.

Nanabozhu replied with an extremely innocent expression on his face. “Who me”?

Final score: Nanabozhu 42, Maui 41.

(To be continued)

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