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Dutchman’s Breeches



Every spring,

fae Dutchmen flock to free these fancy breeches

from my forest fronds.


Taylor Swift


Picture

I was surprised to find
I dreampt of you last night.

Suffice to say
in looking for your own
I found you reading in your sacred space.

We met as friends
but my profession of wanting more too soon,
led to your exit from the room.

Normally a dream would have ended there, but

I was surprised to find,
I saw you once again!

And in looking for my own
I found you curled up reading
in another sacred space.

And upon seeing me,
I watched you in your haste of flight
to find another place,

I was saddened by regret,

that true intimacy is shared,
not taken.

The One Day


Sitting on my porch rocker
listening to the frogs’ spring chorus
enjoying the one day
between last night’s hail
and the beginning of mosquito season.

The Undiscovered Country


20200319_191439If I were to die tomorrow…
The thought has crossed my mind a few times today. What with Corvid-19 going around and being 65 and a hypochondriac. I have the dry cough, sore red throat, and congestion. Wifie says the virus kills the cilia lining the throat. You can’t cough stuff up so you get pneumonia and die.

So, if I were to die tomorrow. I wouldn’t be too upset. A sudden illness and quick death would be much better to me than say, a slow decline into Alzheimers. Better to rip the bandage off quickly than to peel it back slowly.

Hm. All this imagery.

I suppose I’m not too worried because I have certain expectations of death. It will be like the next horizon. The undiscovered country. When I stand there, you’ll see me, but you won’t see those whom I see on the other side of the hill. There are the people I leave behind and the people I meet: generations of family members, friends, acquaintances, and strangers for whom I’ve done so many things I don’t remember.

Life’s been good. For the past 33 years. I’ve had a better half who has kept my heart warm, life challenging, and to whose presence I’ve looked forward every morning. If it’s true that “man is, that he might have joy”, then, having “endured to the end”, I have “fulfilled the measure of my creation”.

I do have my regrets though. I wish I were more brave, and could have said those things I wanted for my family and friends, to them. I’ve partially hidden behind a facade of “live and let live”, and Zen. That if people wanted to change, wanted more, they would have pursued it.

But that’s not totally true either. People are sometimes afraid, and that fear can keep them from what they want. Just as my fear of rejection keeps me from sharing what I want for them. Perhaps if I had said something, I could have helped them with their fear.

I know there is no letting someone do something. I can’t control my family, friends, and acquaintances, but, I can influence you.

So if I were to die tomorrow, tonight I would say to you, “Be Good”. Most of the troubles we endure, we create ourselves. Live while looking forward with an eye of faith to the undiscovered country. Life is eternal.

I left a Friend Behind


A world away,
in another time,
and in my callow youth,
I returned to the land
of my inheritance…
and left a friend behind,

Now,
in an older age,
regret blooms
from the fertile soil of memory.

Where is that friend?
Did they realize their hopes and dreams?

I realize now, that there is no thing
more important in the eternities
than our association.

I will try to transcend time
and sift through the Earth
to reconnect.

If it pleases them.


Dedicated to:

Osamu Ujita Kyodai 1981 (Not pictured)

and the following.

Ukie Ueyama Shimai 1981
Fumiyo Sugiyama Shimai 1981
Misako Fujiwara Shimai 1981

So Many Souls


So many souls,
voices crying out.

See me!

Hear me!

Feel for me!

Will others pause their journey through this crowd, in this busy world,

long enough to notice you,

one human being, among the

poets,
singers,
writers
artists,
actors
dancers,
and performers,

whom chance has revealed,

as you vie for the attention of a kindred spirit?


20200306_112700The full title reads: ” “Chippewa Indians of Minnesota, Incorporated” — BallClub, July 13-15, 1920. Benjamin Caswell, of Cass Lake, President” “and in another place “Rich” Photo –Bemidji–

I found this photo in my Grandmother’s shed. Having cleaned it out a few months after she died in 1985. “Lizzy” Elizabeth Joyce Mason is the girl with the bow in her hair on the far left. She was 14 then.

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To the left of her is my Great -Grandfather, “Neogeshig”, or Thomas Jefferson Jerome Mason. You can tell from his visage that Littlecreek men received many facial characteristics from him. 🙂

He’s holding Helen C. Mason, age 2, and I believe that little boy half hiding behind his pant leg to the left of him is either his son Vilas, age 6, or son Thomas Jr., age 7.

I figured I’d better put this photograph online somewhere so others could benefit from it–since it’s been sitting on top of my dresser all these years.

I am amazed at the amount of personal family history contained in this photograph. Who are all these people???

The expression of their genes is so strong, I think I would recognize their descendants from this picture! Let me know if you know any of them.

After uploading the whole photo,  I noticed that it was compressed so much that I couldn’t really identify anyone, so I’m adding enlarged sections of it above and below.

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I’m guessing that the man sitting apart from the others in the front bottom row, as a place of prominence, is Benjamin Caswell. Can anyone confirm this?20200306_125403

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Aren’t phone cameras great?

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